Wednesday, April 30, 2008

I'm trying to be patient

FOUR MONTHS AGO

I pull up to the Taco Bell intercom.
Me: I'd like two tacos and a bean burrito with no onions.
Intercom Voice: FSNRPHRIPHNRANRPHSNARN
Me: Okay thanks.
I pull around to the window.
Me: Did you know your intercom is at an eardrum-blowing level?
Taco Bell lady: Yeah, there's nothing we can do about it.
Me: Ohhhkay.

TWO MONTHS AGO

I pull up to the Taco Bell intercom.
Me: I'd like to try something new. I'll have two tacos and... a spicy chicken burrito.
Voice: Anything else for you?
Me: No. Wait, unless there's onions in the burrito.
Voice: It has fiesta.
Me: .....
Me: Mmm, sounds like a party.
Voice: I'm sorry?
Me: I don't know what you mean when you say it has fiesta.
Voice: The burrito has fiesta in it.
Me: Right. What does that mean?
Voice (clearly annoyed): Fiesta is a combination of onions, tomatoes, and chilis.
Me: So it has onions in it?
Voice: Well, it has fiesta. But yeah, it has onions.
Me: Okay, then on my chicken burrito, hold the fiesta.

TODAY

I pull up to the Taco Bell intercom.
Voice: Can I help you?
Me: I'd like two tacos, a bean burrito, and a nachos.
Total silence for an honest 30 seconds.
Voice: I've got a nachos, a bean burrito, and a nachos?
Me: Close.

Monday, April 28, 2008

An addendum

Okay, I must confess that I've re-taken the typing test several times now and every time my score has been lower than 118 wpm. So I guess I'm a bit of a phony. But the 118 was legit when I got it; I really did.

The good news is that every time I've taken it, I've gotten over 100. So I do find that somewhat fulfilling.

Can you tell it's finals season? The most fulfilling thing in my life is a TYPING TEST.

No, Dad, I'm not wasting precious study time. I'm... "practicing my typing skills so as to better utilize the 3 hour exam slot to its fullest advantage." Hey, now I'm really starting to sound like a lawyer.

Saturday, April 26, 2008

Lousy Charlottesville

ENORMOUS cricket in my sink right now. The kind that would make Rosa freak out for days. Just standing there next to my soaking dishes (not that I ever leave dishes in the sink, Mom). This is the beauty of living in a town out in the middle of nowhere.

Speaking of that, we were enjoying a lovely day in here, sun, highs in the 80s, light breeze, all of that, when suddenly CRACK! Thunder, a little lightning, and out of nowhere a major downpour. With my car windows open. Sorry, Sis Who's Buying My Car In A Month - but don't worry, our father raised me to have dozens of rags on hand for occasions just like this. The car is fine.

But anyway, since it's raining in Charlottesville and the wind is blowing a little, of course we lost power for a bit. Props to Virginia Dominion for getting it back on swiftly, but oh my goodness.

At least classes are over. And at least I'm moving to Salt Lake for the summer where my fabulous parents have a fabulously new house with a fabulous backup generator. And then off to New York City where the crickets don't dare enter a midrise apartment complex for fear of being shot.

Friday, April 25, 2008

Good Samaritan Robbed

This morning I saw a story on the Today show that just broke my heart.

A young ROTC man walks out of a store, strikes up a conversation with a homeless man, and then hands him some spare change. Moments later, the ROTC man suddenly suffers from a major seizure. While the ROTC man is convulsing on the ground, the homeless man doesn't run to get help but instead robs the distressed man.

Disgusting.

I should say that all of this is not proven, but only alleged. But they've got it all on videotape.

Read the story here.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Church choir

So true. Which one are you?



Hat tip: Church Times via A Cappella News.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

A few laughs

From Jay Leno's monologue Monday night:

"Vanilla Ice was arrested and charged with shoving his wife; and like most people, the police had none of his records."

I'm sorry, but I thought that was just hilarious.

Then I just had to share this email I got from Rosa Monday night:

Esther and I were at Walmart, and we were walking out of the restroom when we saw this can.

Did they really need to clarify??


Wednesday, April 02, 2008

My car

I'm sitting here in the Toyota service center waiting for my Highlander to have its 75,000-mile checkup. This seemingly mundane moment actually brings a set of mixed feelings for me.

A gift from my generous parents as I returned from Spain in Fall 2002, my car has been my most reliable friend over the past 5+ years. She's driven with me back and forth from Utah to California numerous times; all the way to Virginia and back twice; and to Georgia, North Carolina, and New York for various school and music commitments. She spent last summer parked in New York just outside Manhattan, making a couple trips upstate to visit friends. Though sometimes a little late on my timing, I've given her every service and every update she's needed. Which, since she's a Toyota, hasn't been that many.

So why the mixed feelings? The truth is that our relationship is doomed. I'm moving to New York City in the fall to start my new job and I just can't take her with me. Having a car in Manhattan is more of a liability than an asset. Not including all the expenses of insuring and fueling the car, the parking alone is cost prohibitive; The $500+ per month you spend housing the car is like letting it have its own apartment. In essence, my new job is taking me to a place she can't come. So sad.

The silver lining here is that I'll be selling the car to my sister in Ohio. Her car is on its way out, and considering how expensive a new car is, and how unreliable an unknown used car can be, it's actually a win-win. It'll be a good car for her family (they already love their other Highlander), the price is right, and I need to sell. Jenga.

Even so, it's still a little sad for me. This was the car that greeted me at the airport when I returned from Spain. This was the car that moved me to school after my mission. This was the car that provided me a social life while in college. This was the car I drove away from my wedding in. We're nearly inseparable.

But alas, we will soon separate. We now face the inevitable. We only have another 6-8 weeks together. I should start one of those construction paper chains so I can count down the days.

Of course it's all for the best. Here's to you, my Highlander.

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

No foolin'

I don't really have anything to write about, but I thought it would be cool to have a post on April Fool's Day with that title.